she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
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