He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize