before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize