I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
