i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
did i walk over a car last night?
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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