you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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