OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize