FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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