We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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