your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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