Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out