No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
