Old men and throwing up are my life now.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
