Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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