maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
You pole danced in your parka.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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