Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Randomize
