please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
