i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Randomize
