btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
