Can Purell be used as lube?
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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