i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Randomize
