"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
he shaved USA in his pubs
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Randomize
