absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
