Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
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