trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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