like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Randomize
