but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
We left an ass print on the piano.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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