i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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