careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
