I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
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It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
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I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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