My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Randomize
