id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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