I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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