the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
