I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize