I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize