Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
