Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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