just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
