wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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