I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Randomize
