He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
