I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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