I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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