I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
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I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
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I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
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