She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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