yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
