why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
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