tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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