the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
this is an emotional support booty call
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
You left your phone here
Wait...
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