If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
