You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
